So...an ordinarily honest person who feels impelled to witness in one way or another for the truth against the untruth that prevails precisely because it is regarded as the truth. He is well aware that there is danger, but he is willing to expose himself to it.
And yet he perhaps has not quite understood himself. He is, however, entirely convinced of the truth of what he wants to point out; he is convinced to such a degree that he is involuntarily –ah, human heart!– constrained to believe that if only it is heard it must triumph, win people to its side.
So, then, he speaks out – but strangely enough he encounters opposition everywhere; he reaps ingratitude in every form, not only form those from whom he had expected it, but also from those for whose sake he had thought he ought to witness to the truth – just as, for example, Moses had his grief not only with the Egyptians but also with the Hebrews, for whose sake he had exposed himself to all the troubles and dangers.
Now this person becomes uneasy; he is oppressed. So he has recourse, as usual, there where he is accustomed to seek help – to Governance. He lays out his distress–what will Governance reply? Kind and gentle as always, Governance replies: Is it not true that you wanted to practice self denial; can you deny that it worked out that way; right now the opportunity to practice it is indeed before you.
Let us suppose, then, that he answers: Yes, that I understand; now I understand it. But, to be honest, I did not understand it quite that way when I decided to act and began. I feel as if the sea is getting too rough for me.
What will Governance probably reply? Kind and gently as always, never cruel, Governance says: Yes, yes, my little friend, when you have humbled yourself under this and learned humility from this little lesson, then we shall help you out of this again.
But something else could happen. As governance is explaining to the struggling one how it all hangs together, that precisely this is part of true self-denial, a transformation takes place in him. Like a child's surprise when it suddenly understands, like the blissful surprise of a girl in love when she suddenly understands that what she had interpreted as testifying against her being loved actually testifies to it–so also is his surprise. He says, what I suffered or that which pained me was really that in this adversity I saw proof that everything had gone wrong for me. But now when you, kind Governance, explain it to me and explain yourself to me, I now wish only to remain out there in an understanding with you.
And yet he perhaps has not quite understood himself. He is, however, entirely convinced of the truth of what he wants to point out; he is convinced to such a degree that he is involuntarily –ah, human heart!– constrained to believe that if only it is heard it must triumph, win people to its side.
So, then, he speaks out – but strangely enough he encounters opposition everywhere; he reaps ingratitude in every form, not only form those from whom he had expected it, but also from those for whose sake he had thought he ought to witness to the truth – just as, for example, Moses had his grief not only with the Egyptians but also with the Hebrews, for whose sake he had exposed himself to all the troubles and dangers.
Now this person becomes uneasy; he is oppressed. So he has recourse, as usual, there where he is accustomed to seek help – to Governance. He lays out his distress–what will Governance reply? Kind and gentle as always, Governance replies: Is it not true that you wanted to practice self denial; can you deny that it worked out that way; right now the opportunity to practice it is indeed before you.
Let us suppose, then, that he answers: Yes, that I understand; now I understand it. But, to be honest, I did not understand it quite that way when I decided to act and began. I feel as if the sea is getting too rough for me.
What will Governance probably reply? Kind and gently as always, never cruel, Governance says: Yes, yes, my little friend, when you have humbled yourself under this and learned humility from this little lesson, then we shall help you out of this again.
But something else could happen. As governance is explaining to the struggling one how it all hangs together, that precisely this is part of true self-denial, a transformation takes place in him. Like a child's surprise when it suddenly understands, like the blissful surprise of a girl in love when she suddenly understands that what she had interpreted as testifying against her being loved actually testifies to it–so also is his surprise. He says, what I suffered or that which pained me was really that in this adversity I saw proof that everything had gone wrong for me. But now when you, kind Governance, explain it to me and explain yourself to me, I now wish only to remain out there in an understanding with you.
